A couple of days ago I told you about reading Where Love Once Lived from cover to cover as a final check. I told you about the 26 errors I found and that I suspect there are more I didn't find. But, as I read, I spotted many things I like about the book. Indeed, there are several unique phrases I am proud of.
I've been reading some of the discussion on the acfwbookclub (American Christian Fiction Writers) group and recently the mediator asked the members if they had a favorite line from the book they were discussing for the month. Well, I have several favorites from my book, but wonder if anyone else will even notice them. Perhaps sometime in the future, I'll tell you what my favorites are.
As I read Where Love Once Lived I also spotted some words that I had forgotten were there. One paragraph in particular sums up what's happened from Karen's viewpoint. It also demonstrates some of the ways I used to create conflict and tension. Here is an excerpt from page 242:
It had been a rollercoaster ride. When Brian showed up in the bookmobile, she’d been angry with him because he forced her to dredge up memories she’d suppressed. The more she got to know him, the more she began to wonder if there could be something between them again. Something new and exciting that had been missing in her life. Then, when she felt there was a possibility for love, he’d learned Judy had tricked him into marrying her, and finally, Karen had feared telling him about her pregnancy would hurt him too much.
As I said, this is a good summary of what's happened up to this point. Of course we are only seeing it from Karen's eyes. Brian will have a similar story to tell if he is asked, but it would be different in many ways.
When I read this the other day, my first thought was that it could be cut without hurting the story. There's nothing new in the paragraph for the reader. But I left it in because Karen needed to think it. In the paragraphs that follow she uses this knowledge to consider alternatives and make decisions about her future.
Let me know what you think.